being old and out of it means avoiding crappy pop songs!

Upon reading the Village Voice’s Worst Song of 2010 article, I realized that what I vaguely recognized as “one of those iPhone commercial songs” was actually the top rock song of the year: Train’s “Hey Soul Sister”.

And upon reading the Wikipedia entry, I realize that not recognizing the song saved me a year of annoyance. Because then, I would have to think about how it’s an insult to the entire Burning Man community, since it is apparently the lead singer’s fantasy of what he thinks Burning Man is like (“beautiful naked women dancing around a fire”). The whole thing is entirely too reminiscent of the Terrible Pop Rock Trend From Ten Years Ago. Which, now that I think about it, was the last time Train was popular.

What the hell is it about the end of a decade that generates such craptacular “alterna-lite” music? Ten years ago there was that stupid Vertical Horizon band, which I always assumed was actually a corporate shill for Verizon. There were all sorts of bands with numbers in them: Eve 6, Stroke 9, Blink 182, all of whom annoyed me. And the bands that kicked off this dreadful trend, like Live and Counting Crows, who were actually good artists, had imploded in the wake of popularity and been watered down into the same pablum as the other bands. Enter Train, with “Meet Virginia”. Now, we’re in 2010, and I’m surprised Smash Mouth didn’t make a comeback along with these guys. But we did get that “Airborne Toxic Event” band and, look, I’m really sorry, but Vampire Weekend officially because a Crap Rock Lite band the second the ink dried on their contract to sell “Holiday” to Tommy Hilfiger.

Fortunately, I have managed to turn myself into someone who is old, married, and out of it. I only recognize pop dance tracks when they’re the other half of a mashup, and I have managed to block out most pop rock tracks by not listening to the radio. I hear that there may have been a lot of decent music that did happen in 2010, and I probably should have paid attention and listened to it. Especially since, now that I think about it I honestly have no idea what I have been listening to. I know I heard some new albums by much beloved bands (the Birthday Massacre put out a new album this fall that I listened to multiple times in a row). And I did hear some new music through co-workers, especially if it was Deadmau5. But I listen to music in the car, and if Ben was in it, I was probably playing Pixar movie soundtrack songs. I can’t tell if this is because I’m a working mom, or if it’s because I just ran out of energy to care. Which is actually the same thing. But whatever the reason, it saved me having to hear more than a few seconds at a time of “Hey, Soul Sister”.

Oh, and for the record? I would have actually stacked anything by Katy Perry as one of the worst songs of the year. I cringe at how bad those songs are, and firmly believe they are straight out of a soundtrack to Idiocracy.

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