my delivery will be free of celebrities

Yay! Both Jessica Alba and Tori Spelling have given birth now!

Well, Tori didn’t so much give birth as get a scheduled C-section. Now, let us all be thankful that C-sections are an option these days when needed – but part of me wonders if Tori needed it. I guess she just wanted the kid out fast so TMZ would stop following her around and judging her every move: going to the nail salon, eating soft-serve with potential listeria, eating hot dogs with nitrates, getting her hair bleached, etc.

The point is, I can now go give birth without those pesky paparazzi around the hospital. Thank you Tori, for not wanting to put the effort into a vaginal delivery!

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