parental overload

Paul’s parents are here this week. Well, not right now. Right now they are in Vegas with Paul and Paul’s brother Steve. But they are in the general region this week, and were here Thursday and Friday. My mother is also here, because she wanted to visit her daughter & her best friend in L.A., and by coming this weekend, she got to meet Paul’s family. She is also not here right now though, because she is in West L.A. at her best-friend-of-fifty-years’ house. And I love my mommy – but I am SO parent’d out right now that I am glad to be alone.

So that’s why I’m home right now, in my apartment in Old Los Angeles, which seems huge tonight with only myself to inhabit it. I wanted the quiet time to finish the book I was reading (Lois Battle’s Storyville), to blog, and to get some sleep. It has been a whirlwind – and exhausting – few days with both our moms, one dad, and one younger sibling (my dad and my sister being back in Canada). All the parents rolled in on Thursday, spent Friday hanging out, and then Paul’s family left today while I spent the day with Mom. But everyone has been getting along splendidly, and if I’m tired, it’s just from doing so much on top of an exhausting work week. I didn’t even have to expend much energy on making sure everyone got along. I’m just tired from schlepping all over Los Angeles for two days.

This kind of weekend reminds me a lot of the expression “you don’t get to choose your relatives.” You not only do not get to choose your blood relatives, but you also don’t get to choose the family that you acquire by marriage. All our parents are being introduced and being told, “OK, here’s the people you will be SHARING ALL FUTURE GENERATIONS WITH.” In my case, that’s then appended with “because your kids got drunk and hooked up at a Hollywood goth club.” My mother spent Friday afternoon at the Getty Villa, chatting about gardens with Paul’s mom, pretty much because Paul and I both went to Bar Sinister one night in 2006. They will be connected for life because Paul and I are getting married.

I think we’re really lucky though. Both Paul and I have very, very sweet mothers. Both of our mothers appreciated how the other family had readily taken in and welcomed Paul and I. I feel like his family immediately accepted me as part of their extended clan, and my family, after a brief hazing, did the same with Paul. Both of them are already warm and friendly enough that I have high hopes of them really liking each other, rather than just accepting that they have to put up with each other like so many in-laws do. My mother thinks Paul’s dad is also wonderful, and I think his parents will get along fine with my father when they meet him next month. This has been an exceptionally not stressful weekend, and I’m very very lucky.

I’m just still so tired that I didn’t have the energy to go see my friends tonight. And now, I barely have the energy to keep my eyes open. It’s time to go curl up in bed, all alone, which I am NOT used to. Tomorrow, my mother meets more of my friends. And her friends meet my friends. And my bridal shower planning kicks off. Yay.

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